Personal Childhood And Past Trauma Stories:
My Sister No Longer Hates Me
It's 2011
I'm on the phone with my sister who is seven years older then me. I'm really enjoying the conversation and thinking about how nice it is that she and I can have this good of a conversation for as long as we are.
We have a history of conversations being her criticizing me for strange things...like how when I was in 9th grade and a size 10, how large that was...or when I lost my virginity at age 15 but I was the one who was supposed to make it to marriage even though both my sisters were having sex at age 13 and 14. Or when she would visit for Christmas and I would say a prayer before sleep and she would say it was just for show even though it was my routine every night and I liked doing it out loud (I found out later in life it's how I transmute and set healing codes)
My sister also made sure, when we were little, that I never said her name in public, and if I messed up I would get absolutely verbally destroyed...anyway, I'm elated that this phone conversation is going so well.
She is actually asking me how my child is, how my husband is. She seems genuinely interested in my work promotions and the conversation is the best I've ever had with her in my entire life.
Then she decides to tell me "I'm no longer mad at you." I said, "Wait. you were mad at me? why?".
She says "oh yes, but I talked through it in therapy& and I'm no longer mad at you!"
I said "why were you mad at me?" she said "Oh. because you got married, had a child, bought a house, and chose to stay in our home town.
I was so upset with you for not going into acting or moving to a city and actually doing something with your life. but I healed it in therapy and I'm no longer upset with you. isn't that GREAT?"
I spent all of 2015 silent from her, while I healed my childhood trauma.
Right before I went silent she called and said she couldn't believe I wasn't calling her and checking up on her 2nd pregnancy and that I didn't care about her.
It's the first family member I ever went silent with and cut off.
It was extremely difficult.
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